This fall brings more changes to the Neepeople.  Jim and I made the decision to put the kids in the local public school this fall.  When Ana would have begun attending three years ago, the passing scores for reading and math were, frankly, abysmal.  A new prinicipal has arrived at the school and the scores have soared, from 60% of students passing to 90%.  The class sizes are said to be small and inappropriate behavior by students is not tolerated (according to my neighbors).

Before I went to back to work in January, I was able to get the kids out of the house and somewhat involved in the community several times a week.  That is now nearly impossible as I take the car to work and Jim has his own work responsibilities in the house.  The kids were spending most of their afternoons entertaining themselves, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but they were beginning to get on each others nerves quite a bit and we were becoming concerned with their abiity to have friends and “a social life” for lack of a better term.  It just doesn’t seem like a good way to live.  Kids, even good kids, can get into trouble when left to much to their own devices and we all need friends.  So, on we go.

The current plan is for them to attend the public school this year with an eye towards possibly transferring them to private school next year.  I am going to add a day of work to my schedule, with a different company that places therapist in the school system.  The pay is excellent and were I to go full time, we would likely be able to afford the expense of private school if we deem it necessary.  Working one day a week in a school gives me a chance to “try out” working in that setting before committing.

I am in a slight quandry mentally right now about the whole thing, as my work situation right now, while not terrible, is also not ideal.  My caseload this last month has been quite low, with an average of 2 to 3 patients every day, leaving me with two to three hours to kill each day.  This doesn’t seem particularly cost effective for the company I work for and I also feel a bit, well, useless.  I have no complaints about my co-workers or my supervisor; they are all wonderful people and the clients that I do have are wonderful people/families whom I truly enjoy serving as a speech language pathologist.  But, I could make twice the money working for the other company and work school hours to boot (with summers off!)

I am also concerned about my own “extra-curricular” activities, chanting at church and Sunday School.  I hardly practice chanting now  and not being a real musician, I really should.  Adding an extra day of work to the mix certainly isn’t going to give me more time to practice. The last few months of Sunday School last year saw me making last minute preparations each week.  Luckily our Sunday School has a rotation for teachers so that I teach three weeks on/six weeks off.  Still, it doesn’t seem right that the kids should get a bummer of  a lesson every time I teach.

And, of course, I am also dealing with a parent’s feelings around sending my kids to school for the first time, albeit a little later than most.  Will they get beat up?  Will they make friends?  Will David be a trouble maker in class?  I don’t have to worry too much about Ana on that score, she is way to concerned about “doing the right thing.”  David, however, marches to his own beat and sometimes thinks rules are for other people.  There is the sadness of knowing I won’t see them all day since I’ll send them to school at 8:30, report to work myself at 12:00 PM and not see them again till I get home from work at 5:30 PM(another reason to seriously consider switching jobs).  I do plan on volunteering at the school at least one morning a week.

Then, there is the weird, “letting go of homeschooling” thing going on.  It’s easy to get your pride up as a homeschooling parent because you constantly have to defend your decision to keep the kids at home.  Well now, we’re kind of just like everyone else.  We never “spit in the face” of regular schoolers, but I suspect that there was a bit of hidden pride in there, which is now feeling somewhat wounded, as if we failed our children somehow and everyone knows it.  Nyah, nyah, nyah.  Yes, I know it’s ridiculous.  But there it is, may God and all of humanity forgive me!

I do admit that there is a part of me looking forward to having a morning or two to myself.  This has been, ladies and gentleman, a difficult year.  I don’t want to re-hash it, but suffice it to say that I am a bit weary and could use a little time to decompress.  I am afraid I would start to get bored with so much time to myself every day, but a few weeks of spare time could definitely be put to use.  There are some writing projects that I could maybe re-address…if I even remember them.

I think that’s all the news that fit to print at the moment.  We here at neeopolis would certainly covet your prayers and good thoughts as we begin our latest adventure!

The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.

~J.R.R. Tolkien

Sung by Bilbo, as the leaves the Shire, having given up the ring and life as he knew it.  It seems somewhat appropriate to post on my birthday, especially as one of my gifts was a book of Tolkien maps.  Thank you all for being part of the blessings on my road!

Yesterday, I had my yearly gyn appointment.  Actually, it had been over a year since I went for a yearly, but I had so many appointments after my surgery last year that I figured I could get a way with a few extra months.  This appointment started out a little differently from those previous.  The first questions my doctor asked were, “Any hot flashes or night sweats?”

The answer is “no.”  I’m definitely not menopausal yet, but I suppose those days are not in the distant future.  I also have to have a “baseline mammogram.”  So there you go.  Life marches on and leaves it’s foot prints on my body.  There’s not a whole lot I can do about it, but as my father says, “It’s better than the alternative.”

The doc also thinks I’m headed for a hysterectomy sometime in the near future as I’m experiencing the same difficulties that have lead to three d & c’s and two failed ablations in the last 10 years.  At one point, this would have saddened me as it means a definite end to my “child bearing years.”  However, I’m now so tired of dealing with all this stuff that I’m quite willing to have the surgery, put it all behind me and get on with my life without having to carry “protection” everywhere I go.  I have two beautiful, inquisitive and creative children who bless me every day.  I am thankful for those blessings I have and confident that I have been given just what I need.  My uterus, with all its attendant finicky-ness, feels like excess baggage at this point.

And on to less serious changes…my exercise routine has changed of late.  I used to be an early morning walker.  I really enjoy walking in the morning.  Unfortunately, a police officer was shot not one mile from where I walk at exactly the same time I go out every morning.  I no longer felt safe, even at an early hour when I thought all the bad guys would be in bed.  The morning walk was abandoned for a couple of weeks.

I was somewhat shocked at the effect it had on me.  The absence of my morning constitutional left me feeling tired, draggy and even a little teary eyed some days.  I suppose I really needed those endorphins.  Last weekend, we went to the local thrift shop to exchange David’s old bike for a new one since he was ready to go training wheel free.  The shop happened to have a decent mountain bike.  And…all bikes were 50% off.  Thus, we came home with two bikes instead of one.  Jim felt that I’d be somewhat safer on a bike as I’d be harder to catch (ha!).  The bike was taken to a bike shop for a tune up and I’ve ridden it the last couple of mornings….I’m taking this morning off as my knees are a little achey and I don’t want to overdo.  I’ve felt an immediate difference in my mood.  It’s simply amazing.

I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to ride the bike, since it had been so long since I’d been on one.  But, whaddya know, the wise council of “they” was right again.  You just get right on and go!

David, while initially afraid to try to ride without training wheels, is now zooming around like a champ.  I wish I had a picture of his face the first time (and he balanced on the bike perfectly on the first try).  The joy reflected there was as bright as sunlight!  David actually thought I would let him get away with “trying tomorrow.”  I knew, however, that he could do it as he’s been balancing on the two wheeled scooter his aunt and uncle gave him for Christmas for months now.  The sweetest part of it all was that one day prior to his first time out without training wheels, David had drawn a picture of himself riding a bike without training wheels with me standing behind him, my hands in the air and a big smile on my face.  When he made that first trip I said, “David, you made your picture come true.”

“Yeah,” he said, almost bashful, “I did.”

He needs to nail down starting and stopping, but he’ll get there.

Jim has been using the bike for running errands to biekable distances.  I’ll probably take it to a meeting at church in the morning.  Saving gas money is a good thing these days.  We’ll all (including the earth) be healthier for it.

It’s all good!  God bless!

20080721-JWN0587, originally uploaded by neepeople.

One of my co-workers describes Assateague as a magical place, and indeed, it does seem so. How often does one get to respectfully share the beach with such magnificent creatures as these. One of the more beautiful sights was waking up to see the horses laying on the beach first thing in the morning.

The Assateague horses are not “big” horses, which is why they are often mislabeled “ponies.” They are beautiful creatures mostly wild, but wiley enough to search for trash in the campgrounds. I tried very hard to impress upon the children that the horses had the right of way; that this was their island and we were only visiting. The horses seemed to know that we were invaders and sometimes stood stock still for 20 minutes at a time, staring about them, as if on guard.

At any rate, our vacation was a good one. Grandmom came a long to make some memories with the kids even though she is not a camper. My guess is that she’ll be spending the night in a hotel next year! The kids always have a good time despite smoky campfires and never quite being able to get sand out of unmentionable orifices. I think for all of us it is good just to get out of our regular routine and away from the electronic devices that distract us.

It’s amazing what a girl can get accomplished when she wakes up at 6 AM and doesn’t go for a walk.  Last night on the way out the door for Vespers, my knee did that crazy thing it does sometimes.  It feels as though gravel has inserted itself between my kneecap and the joint.  Not terribly painful, but rather uncomfortable and I’m sure it portends of the type of physical decline I can expect in the future.  By the time we arrived at church it felt mostly better, but this morning finds it slightly tender.  I decided that it might be better to rest today so I can walk tomorrow.

I’ve always been more of a morning person.  It seems to be when my energy levels are at their peak and when I am most creative.  Even when I was in high school and college and had major exams to study for or papers to write, I went to bed a little early and set my alarm for 4 AM a much more effective method for me than “pulling an all nighter.”  My roommate was the queen of the all nighters.  I remember her staying up to write papers she hadn’t even started on that were due the following day.  I could never understand how it was that I would start on a paper as soon as I received the class syllabus and get an “A” and she would wait till the last minute and receive the same grade.  I used to think it wasn’t “fair” somehow.  Now I know people are different and our engines all take a different type of fuel for motivation.

Anyway, with a morning off from walking, I’ve managed to wash small amount of dishes, water the plants, fill up the bird feeder (greedy little creatures, the feeder will be nearly empty by noon), write a letter to a friend in need and re-pot a geranium and lavender plant.  The geranium I actually started from seed and didn’t have high hopes for at the beginning of the summer.  But, it has shown some tenacity and has hung on to reach the respectable seedling size of 2 or 3 inches.  I made the mistake of combining two types of lavender plants in the same large pot this year.  One of them expanded to such a degree it was pushing the other right out of the pot.  So, I gave the smaller plant its own digs.  I think it will be happier there.  And my resolution to scale down the gardening has obviously blown away on a warm summer wind.  I don’t have window planters on the porch, but otherwise, there are as many plants out there as usual.

I enjoy my plants.  Weirdly enough, I almost think they have personalities.  The English Lavender is bold and showy, preferring to be the center of attention while the Spanish Lavender is more goal oriented.  It wants to reach the sky.  The Scaevola is needy and petulant and must be cared for daily or it withhold its display.  Geraniums are a bit on the goofy side, but loveable, kind of like the slightly dotty great Aunt every family seems to possess.  The Basil just likes to cheer everyone up with it’s bright green leaves and mouth watering scent…she promises good things to come (PESTO!).

Then there are the tomatoes…the ones I swore I wouldn’t plant this year.  But when someone was offering them at 50 cents a plant at church, how could I refuse?  Mine are currently stationed in a box planter that is too small for them and the bottom leaves are beginning to yellow and curl up because of it.  There’s just something so deep and endearing about watching the miracle of life on your front porch.  Every morning, I check to see if there are more blossoms or baby tomatoes appearing.  Flower becoming fruit is just magical and mystical, even in the humble tomato.  I am grounded and reminded that nothing comes from nothing and that ultimately we are all made up of dirt, water, sunshine and air…and to thus we shall return.

God bless and hug a tomato today….